writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Time Together:

I take the initiative to plan and prioritize time alone with my man or woman on a weekly basis. During this time, we talk about meaningful topics (things that matter)

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Problem Resolution:

I make it a priority to resolve problem areas quickly so as to not let them build up or create distance or tensions between us

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Withdrawal:

I do not withdraw from the relationship in ways such as being too busy, clubbing, TV, alcohol, drugs, too much time with friends, sports or activities, being moody, angry, irritated or "pouty"

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Emotional Deposits:

I thoughtfully and purposefully make "emotional deposits" in my partner’s account by kind words, compliments, gifts, remembrances, doing things for, being patient, keeping my word, etc.

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Fun Times Together:

We regularly do things together that we both classify as "fun"

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Blame:

I refrain from blaming my partner for problems and take responsibility first for my part

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Trust:

My partner can count on me to do what I say and keep his or her interests at heart

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Commitment:

I am deeply committed to this relationship and to nurturing and caring for my spouse

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Communication:

I know and practice healthy communication, especially when we are having problems

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Space:

I do not control or try to control my spouse and encourage his or her differences and uniqueness

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Sex:

Our love-making occurs in an atmosphere of emotional closeness and reflects our feeling of emotional intimacy. Sex is by mutual consent, communicative, safe, of satisfactory frequency, and mutually pleasurable

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Plans and Goals:

We have plans, goals and interests in common, and review them occasionally

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Listening:

We nurture each other by careful listening, understanding and empathy

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Eggshells and Off Limits:

I do not have to "be careful" when talking, and we have few or no subjects which are "off limits" for discussion

writeOptions() 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Balance:

Notice that few of these items have much to do with "feelings," as love is better defined as the caring things you do. As you begin the work of intimacy building, you may have to face fears that arise because of the inherent and perceived risks of intimacy. A score of 150 makes you a "genius" at intimacy. The less your score, the more your "challenge" to work toward a closer, deeper relationship. Start today. After all, you only live once!