Monday, 01 October 2007 00:00

Most of my blogs come from the male perspective, and I try to talk about social and political issues under the theme of renaissance and revolution. Had a discussion that elicited strong emotions about relationships, I was chided that all that history and the politics of the day was interesting and all that, but what was I doing to encourage better relationships between men and women. So that it isn’t from my chauvinistic and egotistic perspective, I asked her for a message in her own words. Men and women seem to speak in two different languages, but she was right, she’s more than just her cookies. Read her thoughts below.

NottHead

Why is the self-esteem of some women tied to how quickly a guy wants to bed them? Everywhere you look there are pictures of desirable women. The advertising industry uses attractive women to sell products; but does that lead women to a place of selling themselves?

Women have long known how to use their attractive features to get what they want or even get ahead. Lately it seems that is all we know. When a guy doesn’t show an immediate interest in bedding a woman, she becomes insecure and starts wondering what could be wrong with her. As if that’s all she has to offer. Women who seemingly have it all together (education, career, home, church) can still be reduced to tears at the thought of rejection in a relationship.

Being romanced has seemingly become a thing of the past. What about how much time he spends listening to you, learning about you and sharing experiences with you? We go from dinner, to a second date, to sex. Once you cross that line, it becomes like a new toy that you can’t wait to play with each day. Suddenly, outside of the bedroom your relationship comes to a crawl.

Not to worry, there are lots of guys out there who know how to treat a lady. We just have to be willing to receive it, and understand that we are more than our sexual selves. Know that a real relationship takes time, maturity, patience and understanding. It probably won’t play out like your favorite love story, but it is definitely worth waiting for. I want women to open their eyes and stop selling themselves short. I want men to understand that each woman has value. I am more than just my cookies. Treat each woman like that.

Thanks NottHead for giving me a platform for my words to raise consciousness on male - female relationships. Men and women definitely see things in a different light.